If you’re anything like me, you have a love/hate relationship with to-do lists.
I’ve been ‘blessed’ with the kind of brain that doesn’t turn off at five o’clock. I find myself up at two in the morning, ideas running around in my head like a stampede of wild elephants.
It’s only when I finally grab my iPhone, adding my genius idea to my ever-growing to-do list, that I can go back to sleep… confident that the idea will be there in the morning when I’m coherent enough to act on it. (It’s a 50/50 chance that the idea is actually a good one when I’m awake enough to revisit it.)
But to-do lists are also a bit of a struggle for me because I find myself going a bit crazy with the things that I want to-do.
I start out with things like
· Find a couch
· Buy milk
· Finish project proposal
But then I get excited about the prospect of listing of all of my desires- kind of like an overzealous kid making a Christmas list- and then before I know it, I’m writing things down like
· Become an awesome leader
· Prove that I’m a good worker
· Be the best storyteller in the world
When left unchecked- I catch myself wanting to be perfect at everything- leaving me stressed out, warn out and disheartened as I’m faced with the reality that that’s just never going to be something that I can check off the list.
So when I was reading our last assignment for the Emerging Leaders Program, an introduction to ‘360 Degrees of Influence’, my heart began beating faster- pressure mounting.
There was one tiny item on there that I just wished would slip right off of the page.
“Seek Feedback Everywhere.”
I hated that item because as someone who is trying to require perfection of themselves and constantly failing, the last thing I wanted was someone else pointing it out.
But then we met to discuss our reading and the founder of Adventures in Missions, Seth Barnes, came to speak to us.
He drew a sort of pie chart on the board.
In it, he wrote three different categories.
· Vision
· Planning/Management
· Empowerment/People
He pointed it at it and told us that these are the three keys to effective leadership.
I immediately sank lower in my chair, wondering how the heck I was going to ‘to-do list’ my way into being better in three totally different/huge areas- some of which I am honestly not great at.
And then he said something that changed everything.
“We have to know ourselves- our strengths and our weakness- and be comfortable in the fact that we’re not good at everything. That way, we can bring people alongside of us that are strong where we are weak.”
It felt like an elephant got up off of my chest and walked off into the sunset.
With that one statement, he essentially took my iPhone and deleted the item on my list that said, “be perfect at everything.”
As leaders, we usually excel in one of those categories. For me- I’m great with the vision aspect- but I have some significant room to grow in all three.
But, with a quick comment, he freed me up from the guilt and shame and pressure that made me think I had to be perfect at absolutely everything to be a good leader- or a good anything!
He told us that we have to be secure as leaders. We need to embrace reality- including the reality about ourselves. We have to launch from someplace and we have to know where that place is.
For me, my launching pad is growing in all three areas, while understanding that I’m wired for the vision, and that to be a good leader, I need to surround myself with people that excel where I am weaker.
But above all, I get to launch from the understanding that I don’t have to be perfect at everything.
· Be perfect at casting vision, empowering people and planning/managing
· Embrace how I’m gifted and where I’m starting, and surround myself with people who are strong where I am weak.
